Minnesota Golden Gophers Football: Predictions, Hopes, and Goals for the Game Against Michigan

After reading Models and Bottles, I have quaffed deep from the Chalice of Hope.  The crazy large number of Michigan Wolverine fans who are also sports betting enthusiasts (what else are you going to do in Michigan, go to a museum?  Hahahaha...right) have skewed the Vegas spread for this game WAY out of proportion.  Twelve points, to THIS Michigan team?  It's just going to make the sting of their eventual loss hurt that much more.

Predictions

The Gophers win the turnover battle. Minnesota takes advantage of a young inexperienced quarterback for a trio of interceptions and they recover one Michigan fumble.  The Gophs also give up a couple turnovers, but not four.

The Gophers achieve a (statistically) balanced offense. Michigan will do everything it can to shut down the running game; I'm talking eight guys in the box all day.  The Gophers are still going to be a run-heavy team by the number of play calls, but the yardage gained by running vs. by passing will be pretty similar.  That's kind of a scary thought.

The game will be within one score at the end, and the team with the defense on the field wins. Not sure who that will be, but these two offenses do not have it in them to make a last-minute march to glory.

The Gophers win, sparking an earthquake that causes the Michigan land mass to collapse and sink below the level of the surrounding Great Lakes.  Only the U.P. remains, and it's quickly annexed by Wisconsin (nobody can tell the difference anyway).  So final result of the Gophers win / Michigan loss: We only have 49 states.

Hopes

The Gophers rush for 200 yards. If Minnesota puts up this type of run yardage, I think Michigan will be in trouble, no matter how the passing game is functioning.  Since their defenses goal #1 is to stuff the run tomorrow, a failure in that area probably is a failure to win the game.

The Wolverines hand five turnovers to the Gophers. A few muffed punts would be to my liking.  Hell, I'll even take a defensive illegal substitution on 4th and 4 so Minnesota keeps the ball.  I'm calling that a turnover.

KJ Maye puts superglue on his gloves. I'm so over dropped passes.

No injuries!  Especially to our QBs!

Go Gophers!  Ski-U-Mah!