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Golden Nugz: Draft Recap, Spring Sports, and a Movie Review

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We have a draft round up and updates on other Gopher sports.

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Happy Monday Everyone. The NFL Draft, a monster that has stretched out to three days because grit or something, happened over the weekend. We talk about that, some spring sports, and the movie Draft Day.

Draft Coverage

GopherGuy05, GoAUpher, and the rest of the blog did a terrific job covering the draft. You should reread all of their pieces again. In addition to us, our sister SBNation sites had some thoughts on the Gophers.

Baltimore Beatdown views Maxx Williams as the prototypical Ravens player.

Music City Miracles sees Cobb as a commitment to rebuild the Titans' offense.

BloggingTheBoys thinks that Dallas is following a familiar route by picking Damien Wilson.

The Phinsider wrote a bit about the Dolphins picking Cedric Thompson. They see him as a developmental pick.

Gophers on the Diamond

Softball swept Purdue over the weekend. Sara Groenewegen had 19 strikeouts, a school record.

Baseball was swept by UC Irvine. Minnesota outhit the Anteaters, but was done in by poor defense.

Track and Field

Women's Track and Field set multiple team records in a tune up meet for the Big Ten Championships.

Basketball

We're a bit late to this, but two players requested transfers from the Women's team. Stabresa McDaniel and Tory Jacobs make five players that have transferred in the last year from Coach Stollings' team. The Gophers will likely be thin at the guard position absent some late recruiting pick ups.

Review of a Terrible Sports Related Movie

Since it is the offseason, I'm adding a new feature for my round ups. I watch a terrible sports movie and then talk about it. First up is Draft Day, starring Kevin Costner and Jennifer Garner.

Hoo boy is this movie an exercise is wringing out product placement and formulaic scripting. There's a terrible love story and a poor attempt to pretend that Sonny Weaver doesn't understand twitter. He's so authentic because he's out of touch with modern technology! I'm going to focus on the actual draft mechanics and whether they seems like a Browns move. What follows are spoilers for the film, but this movie is so horrendously bad I'm not sorry. Here's the narrative.

  • Costner as Sonny Weaver is the GM of the Browns. Weaver trades his next three number 1 picks, including the 7th pick in the current draft, for the top spot to draft a QB because their owner wants to make a splash. How Browns is this? Total Browns move
  • There are three players the Browns could take with the first pick. The first is NFL ready, presumptive top draft pick, Heisman trophy winner Bo Callahan out of...Wisconsin.
  • Next is Vontae Mack, a linebacker out of Ohio State, who keeps calling Weaver to ask to be drafted. Mack is considered a hot head because he was kicked out a game for touching a ref after celebrating a touchdown. He was flagged for giving the ball to his dying sister after he scored, which no other pro football team realized, and so was moved down their draft boards. The movie makes clear that if the Browns do not take Mack at seven he will fall out of the first round.
  • Finally, Ray Jennings, the son of a Browns legend, is a running back out of Florida State who is described as the next coming of Trent Richardson.
  • Weaver is told by Vontae Mack, a prospect LB, that said QB is not a lover of winning and gets rattled after sacks. Weaver decides instead of trading the number 1 pick to someone else to just take Mack and not tell anyone because Vontae told him to and his dead dad would have taken Mack. How Browns is this? Replace Mack with Manziel and it actually happened. Definitely a Browns move.
  • Weaver then gets Jacksonville's new GM (whose name he doesn't know because the film needs some exposition) to trade Jacksonville's 6th pick in the first round for the Browns next three years of number 2 picks. Jacksonville, which needs a QB, still panics and agrees because young GMs right? Again, this seems perfectly in line with both the Browns and Jaguars. The movie would have been more realistic if Jacksonville had talked about taking a punter. The film points out multiple times that the Browns have now traded away their future. How Browns is this? Very Browns.
  • But wait! Weaver then calls Seattle and says he will take Bo Callahan at 6. Seattle instead of just saying sure whatever do that, we were already fine with getting your next three number one picks trades back all three picks and a PR. Seattle drafts Callahan and the Browns use their original pick to take Ray Jennings. How Browns is this? The shrewd trading is not at all Browns. Using a first rounder on a bust running back is by definition a Browns move.
  • To recap, The Browns traded away three second round draft choices to draft first overall a player they could have grabbed in the second round and a clear bust running back. The failure is celebrated by the entire city of Cleveland. Overall Browns Rating? Very Browns.